wound

i

somewhere within
   there bleeds the
      wound that
      wrung tears from
      my eyes as a
child.

the wound the
   buddha can’t
      touch.

the wound that darkens the
   heart; dims the
      smile; doesn’t know
      how to
heal.

the pain that
   goes jabbing into the
      night.

ii

how can it hurt so
   much to be
      lonely?

among so many
   treasures, a
      broken
heart.

iii

what is this rage,
   disgust, self-
      hatred? where am i
      dragging this wretched pus-
      sack, seeping through my every
day?

iv

terrified chimp in a
   psychological maze
      grasping his metal frame
      mother, sucking at
      a plastic
teat.

v

if i can’t find love
   why should i
be?

vi

naked on my
   knees, trembling to be
      touched, praying to be
kissed.

vii

how can anyone need a
   woman so badly? i
      want to carve out my
      belly button with a
      butcher’s knife so
      i can give my life
back.

viii

when will this
   suffering end?

   no need for a hangman,
      my tie’s caught in a wringer
      & i’m on my
way!